Sunday, September 25, 2011

Cruel and unusual

I'm bathed in a cold sweat. As my nausea increases, I notice a tic begin to develop on the left side of my face. Somewhere in the preternatural stillness, a clock ticks like some impersonal harbinger of doom.

Wait, I don't have a clock. Where's that coming from?

It's now been four days without a home internet connection. This is intolerable. Life has become a hollow, meaningless shuffling routine.

I've tried filling the void with books, music and DVDs, but it isn't working; somehow, it just makes it all worse (and no, please don't mention TV -- I still have some dignity).

I mentioned my plight to The Drones (at work) but received no sympathy. They seemed to think it was some kind of luxury - yeah, like sugar in your coffee, or Weetbix without milk. Go on, you try that and see how you like it, you sanctimonious Luddite.

No, this really is too-- oh hey, this thing has games on it too! Beauty, that's more like it!

See you in sixteen hours.